I was feeling overwhelmed. Nine days out from a double hernia repair, now I was faced with a bone scan with contrast, ordered by an orthopedic surgeon to make sure that cancer hadn’t spread. My visit to another orthopedic surgeon at Swedish Orthopedic Institute for a second opinion revealed that my right hip is destroyed and needs a full hip replacement. I was feeling like grapes in a winepress. I usually don’t ask God this kind of request, but I asked for a sign.

I arrived at St. Joseph’s hospital in Tacoma and took a seat, waiting for my turn to speak with an intake registrar. A woman came out, called my name, “Grant.” I gathered my things together and followed her back to her office. After taking a seat, she asked me for my license and insurance card, verifying my name and date of birth. While waiting for her computer to respond, I glanced at a bulletin board attached to the wall next to her desk. She had three signs tacked to the board. The first one I read said, “There’s a blessing in the storm.” “Wow,” I thought to myself, “Isn’t that the truth!” The second one said, “Worry ends when faith in God begins.” Like an arrow to a target, I was reminded that my worries—no matter what the outcome—were unfounded. Her sign beckoned me to turn my focus to God, once again choosing to trust Jesus—a moment by moment choice. The third sign read, “Everything will be ok.”

When I was first diagnosed with stage four prostate cancer, both Nancy and Sarah heard from God, “Everything is going to be okay.” Ultimately, I know this to be true; when we are all in heaven, everything’s going to be okay.” But I have a more difficult time believing it now. I had asked for a sign. God gave me three signs—literally—and the third beyond coincidence. Of the four or five hospital intake registrars, I was interviewed by the one with three signs on her wall. I quipped to her, “Are you a sister in Christ?” She smiled and said, “Yes, I am!” I thanked her for the signs!

While having the bone scan later that afternoon, after a radioisotope injection in the morning, I was able to see each scan at its conclusion on a screen to my right. I noticed a bright uptake of radioisotope in my right hip, something that hadn’t appeared on my first scan a year before. I reasoned, just the damage from the destroyed hip and the after-effects of all the radiation.

I waited—at times anxiously—for the results. They came through on the following Monday on my online chart. The radiologist’s report said that the scan of my right hip socket was suspicious for metastasis. Once again, I found myself living in the winepress, constantly looking to Jesus: “Everything is going to be ok.” I called my medical oncologist and left a message relaying the results. She ordered a PSA test to be drawn when we happened to be going to Seattle for another appointment. This past Thursday, I had the blood draw. On Friday, my nurse called. My PSA had fallen from 0.16 to 0.07—indicating that what the radiologist saw in my right hip isn’t cancer but damage from the ball and socket grating on each other. Hallelujah!

Asking for a sign wasn’t the best choice, only revealing my lack of trust. Yet, in the kindness of God, He not only gave me one sign, He gave me three! And out of his continual smile, He gave me literal signs! I can hear Him chuckling in heaven. Yet, even though everything will be okay in the moment, one day, we will receive the fullness of His promise, “Truly, truly I say to you, everyone who believes has eternal life.”

In the meantime, I’m reminded again of John 1:16, “And from his fulness have we all received, grace upon grace.” Literally, the verse reads, “grace in place of grace.” Like waves of the ocean, God gives us grace for the moment. As the impact of His grace recedes like a spent ocean wave, so another wave of His grace comes crashing in. We live moment by moment, sustained by the ocean waves of his constant grace. Romans 1:17 suggests that we also live from faith to faith. Putting the two together then, with each wave of grace—as the wave recedes—God asks me to put my faith in Him. As one wave of grace recedes, and another wave is building strength to take its place, I move from faith to faith. I find great comfort knowing that I’m living out these days in the ocean surf of his grace, sometimes faltering in my faith, my trust in God; nevertheless, His ocean waves of grace keep crashing in. I asked for a sign; He graciously gave me three! Everything, indeed, is going to be okay!